


and i have never known color like this morning reveals to me

by proserpinasacra



Category: Far Cry 5
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Canon-Typical Violence, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Fix-It, Happy Ending, Life-Affirming Sex, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-30
Updated: 2019-03-30
Packaged: 2019-12-25 15:54:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18264560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/proserpinasacra/pseuds/proserpinasacra
Summary: “You don’t understand. The Collapse is upon us, Deputy…”He gripped the arms of her chair to drag it closer, rough hands closing over her wrists. It would have been nothing, some completely unremarkable though mildly threatening touch in any other time, with any other person here in the last weeks that had attempted to beat or capture or otherwise break her, but, but—Everything bloomed into sudden vividness.(female deputy/jacob seed soulmate au written for littlecuddler.tumblr.com as part of the fc5birthdaybash!)





	and i have never known color like this morning reveals to me

**Author's Note:**

  * For [BadGuysPlease](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BadGuysPlease/gifts).



“The world is weak. Soft.”

Fucking monologues. What was it with these people? Rook absolutely didn’t have time for this. Of course, based on how things seemed to be shaking out since the situation turned to shit in Hope County, spending too long in any one region would inevitably get her kidnapped. And, with full honesty, this was actually far better than getting drugged by Faith or attempting to avoid being filleted by any one of John’s numerous knives or other torture sundry.

That didn’t mean she appreciated the Darwinian lecture.

Rook wiggled in her seat, trying in vain to slip the restraints. She had no idea what she’d do if she actually got out, but it seemed better than passively sitting there listening to Jacob Seed or watching his eye sore of a powerpoint presentation. The bright lights of it in the dark room, all vivid white and greyscale in mildly gory pictures, gave her a pounding headache, on top of the ache in her muscles from being restrained and the residual haziness from the bliss bullet.

In short, things sucked.

“Over and over, the lives of the many have outweighed the lives of the few.” Rook forced herself to look back up at Jacob, her expression toughening to a harsh glare accompanied by an eye roll. She wanted this over. Fast.

“Utilitarianism, yeah, sure, can we get passed the lecture, please?”

His eyebrows drew together over his light eyes, but he kept that same icy cold demeanor about him. He sauntered closer, and she instinctively stilled her struggles to watch intently, ready for him, ready for anything.

“You don’t understand. The Collapse is upon us, Deputy…”

He gripped the arms of her chair to drag it closer, rough hands closing over her wrists. It would have been nothing, some completely unremarkable though mildly threatening touch in any other time, with any other person here in the last weeks that had attempted to beat or capture or otherwise break her, but, but—

Everything bloomed into sudden vividness.

The greyscale of her vision shot instantaneously into color. The dimness of the room hardly mattered, because now there was a stunning dimension to everything, a whole array she’d never seen before. Rook’s eyes widened, and her heart seemed to stutter to a jarring stop as she stared at Jacob before her, so much more revealed in color.

His eyes. Still pale, now widened like hers, but icy cold and disbelieving behind the shock. His hair, a loud color completely at odds with the rest of the room, something warm and vivid. The scars littering his cheeks, a similar shade to his hair and beard but darker, and angrier. Everything, everything so much to take in and so startling and utterly new.

They stared at each other. Horror and surprise coursed through her, so numbing she could hardly believe it, let alone fully process it. In that moment, instinct took over, and she reared her head back before jolting forward to slam her forehead into his nose in a well-practiced headbut. _Fuck_.

He reeled back with a curse, gripping at his nose while she blinked stars out of the edges of her newly colorful vision. Her focus darted around the room now that he no longer consumed her entire field of vision, finding with more numb amazement the array of colors even in the dim light, and the vivid contrast present in the still running powerpoint. More of that same warm color in the blood of the fallen deer. Red, then.

“Oh.” Her breath escaped her; she was so stunned she was hardly cognizant of forming words. “Goodness.”

“What the fuck?” Her widened eyes settled back on Jacob, going impossibly wider. The truth trickled in slowly. She didn’t want to believe it.

“What, what the fuck? I didn’t— this isn’t my fault!”

He spat blood, then set the crook she’d put in his nose with a grunt, just like that, holy shit, and sauntered back to her, wide shoulders again blocking her view of the vivid colors displayed in the slides. “That—“ He sneered, “Was definitely your fault. This—“ He leaned down to get up in her face, clamping bloody fingers around her jaw to tilt it towards him. Rook twisted her head fast to try and catch his fingers in her mouth and bite, but he jerked away quickly enough for her teeth to clamp hard on nothing. He was probably still wary after the headbutt. Served him right. “This, is neither of our fault. It’s fucking fate’s fault. You understand what this means, _soulmate_?”

Her blood ran cold through her veins. The truth her brain had obstinately been ignoring. Soulmates. _Soulmates_. Her and Jacob Seed. Cult Herald. He’d touched her and she instantly saw color, no uncertainty or ambivalence about it. “No, no, no. No, no. No. This means nothing because it’s, it’s not—“

“I can see you. All of you. In full color.” He shoved off from the chair, prowling around with a controlled power about him. He hadn’t raised his voice yet, done anything to indicate true anger, only that cold and contained violence he emanated. Jacob circled back around to her where she sat shock still.

“There’s been some mistake.” Rook said breathlessly, a statement even she knew was stupid. He gave her an unimpressed look. Anger flared up in retaliation, fighting spirit overcoming the numb shock. “It can’t be you. You’re the enemy. I don’t want anything to do with you except taking you the hell down.”

“Don’t think the universe cares about that, honey.” He spat derisively, bracing his hands over her wrists again but now hovering just out of reach of any more headbutts or bites. She bared her teeth at him instead, straining forwards against her restraints. “You and I are tied in this now.”

Rook jerked, doing her best with her limited range of motion, and he only watched her, comfortably out of range of her attacks. “I don’t believe that.”

“What don’t you believe?” Jacob snarled, daring to move closer. This time she didn’t go for an attack, only glaring. “This isn’t about belief. Look at me. Tell me what you see.”

She did. Her focus roved over his features, over the scars offered further depth by the harsh contrast of color and those pale, cold eyes. Her heart beat frantic, terror and anger and disbelief still warring within her. “Someone I want nothing to do with. I don’t care. I don’t care. I’m still taking down your brother’s damn cult. And you’re more than welcome to go down with it.”

Something deep and buried, something almost like hurt flickered through his eyes before being shuttering off. She could hear her pulse loud in her ears. He still loomed over her, eyes narrowed disdainfully and blood from his nose dripping slowly onto her knee. Though she made a face, halfway between a snarl of anger and a scrunched up expression of disgust, Rook refused to lean backwards from his leering, even as that cold distance increased with her statement.

“Alright then, _soulmate_.” A shudder ran down her spine to hear the word again on his lips, in that low growl of a voice. “You’ll still serve your original purpose for me. Plans don’t have to change. Let’s see if you’re strong enough to cull the herd.”

Before she could wonder what the fuck that meant, he pulled abruptly backwards and procured a wooden music box from his pocket. As her lips curved around a question and her eyebrows furrowed, he opened it up to the warbling tune of an old song. She didn’t have time to recognize it; the moment the first lyrics started up a ferocious red overtook her vision, and a burning rage started in her gut and flared outward. All she could do then was kill.

The Whitetail militia pulled her from the chair sometime later, and she slept off the aching and the scrapes and the remnant bliss haze in their bunker. Rook didn’t comment on how the orange logo of Wheaty’s shirt clashed obnoxiously with his green jacket. He probably didn’t know. Odds were only one or two others in the bunker knew. Soulmates, though an ever-present part of the culture and public mindset, were relatively rare. Many never found theirs.

Nick and Kim were soulmates, of course, and while Rook couldn’t ask straight on, she listened closely and slowly gathered a lexicon of color as she stayed with them after the commotion in the mountains, attaching words to things she’d never before been able see. Not letting her newfound vision slip proved far more difficult than she could have possibly imagined. The colors bloomed around her, and there were moments she wanted to stop and gape at the beauty of the county. She never knew before, how the simple image of a sunny yellow wildflower buried in the green grass and backdropped by the big blue sky could be so utterly gorgeous.

Eventually, after watching the Ryes be adorable for a week and causing enough trouble down in the valley to get herself kidnapped by John for a second time, she decided a real talk was in order. They’d see each other again, that she knew with certainty, but she wanted it to be on her terms. Whatever control she could take of the situation, she would. Still, her skin crawled with worry as she hiked solo back into Jacob’s region to radio him with a neutral location and time.

Neutral meant the bluffs in the northeast of the Whitetail mountains, because if worse came to worst, she could bug out by wingsuit and didn’t think Jacob would be prepared for her to escape by literally jumping off a cliff. She sat under the nook of a boulder, shielded from snipers or ambush from behind but with long sightlines forward and quick access to the cliff edge, and cut bits of an apple off with a knife to pop into her mouth. The apple was red, splotched here and there with yellow, something that she’d stared at for far too long. She sliced off another edge. It helped the nerves to have something occupying her hands.

Only a few minutes passed before Jacob ambled up, but her line of sight meant he had several more to go to reach her. She watched his ascent carefully, then scanned the far horizon for any other discrepancies. The closer he got, the faster her heart seemed to beat. The urge to run or just flat out shoot him from here itched at her fingers. She could end him now. Easily. But something instinctual deep within her screamed in protest at the thought of killing her _soulmate_. She wrestled with the decision a fraction too long, and the opportunity slipped away. Jacob stopped several paces away from her. Too close. Rook kept the knife in her hand, idly twirling it as she attempted to project far more calm than she felt.

“Smart spot.” He commented, eyes narrowed a fraction.

“Mhm.” A moment passed as they stared each other down, both wary and tense. Eventually she broke from his gaze to look him up and down, then blinked in surprise, her eyebrows drawing together.

“Did those match last time?” Both his knife, his 1911, and his sniper were all the same shade of red. A faded, dull red, but red all the same.

He caught on to her meaning, nodded in affirmation. “They’ve always matched. Didn’t ever realize they were quite so bright.”

“They’re not very, ah, strategically sound.” She laughed nervously, before remembering exactly who she was speaking to and sobering back up. It was hard to laugh near the enemy, no matter what they supposedly were to each other. Her skin crawled uncomfortably. She remembered the words they’d exchanged; the mutual disgust had imprinted harshly in her mind.

“Most people don’t get this.” They stared at each other in silence again. His eyes were the same color as the sky, but several shades lighter and lacking the warmth of the sun. Lacking any warmth at all. “They wouldn’t know anyway.”

Not wanting to talk about her and him specifically, or the rarity of what they’d found in each other, Rook hedged. “Do you know any others?”

He scoffed. “My parents sure as fuck weren’t.”

“Mine either.” She said carefully. She’d read enough snippets of the Book of Joseph to know her own parents couldn’t hold a candle to his.

“Only a few in the Project. Joseph makes a big damn deal about them being fated and holy.” He placed a derisive emphasis on those words, and for once she agreed with him. It was terrifying, infuriating even, to think the universe would shackle her like that in the first place, then worse still to have it idealized.

“Oh, gross…” Her nose wrinkled up with disgust, at not just Joseph but the whole situation, before something occurred to her and her eyes widened with worry. “Does he know?”

Jacob stared at her, cold eyes hard. “Do your little resistance friends know?”

Rook matched his glare obstinately, clenching her jaw tight against the wave of possessive anger at the way he sneered the word _resistance_. She stood, but he didn’t back away, so she settled for trying to puff up and look as threatening as possible.

“Jacob, you fucking swear to me you won’t tell him. Or anyone.” She couldn’t imagine how much worse the preaching-taunting from Joseph would get if he knew. Or the backlash from her friends if it reached her side of the war.

He held his hands up in a surrendering motion, but his face was cruelly amused in the narrowing of his eyes and the twist of his lips. “I’ll swear to you, honey. I’m not in a rush to go spreading word of this weakness around either.”

She rolled her eyes, deciding to take him at his word despite his tone and phrasing. “Gee, thanks.”

“Not surprised you’re ashamed to be my soulmate. No one wants an old, broken soldier.” His eyes seemed flat, cruel and mocking. Rook pressed her lips together and crossed her arms, marching off and daring a risky moment with her eyes off him.

“And you wouldn’t want someone as weak as me. I’ve got all this _compassion_ dragging me down, keeping me from properly culling the herd or whatever.”

“You’ve got potential in you. Ran the trial real impressively.”

“Yeah, well, I could’ve done better without your blood dripping into my eyes.” She spun back to him with a glare, pulling up short to find he’d followed with silent footsteps. Her mind discombobulated for a moment, then she gathered herself.

“You _are_ wrathful, aren’t you? Forest fires always burn themselves out, Deputy, it’s the way of nature.”

“Well, nature decreed you and I are meant to be, so, overall? Fuck it.” He barked out a sharp laugh, looking somehow amused at her biting tone, so she intensified her glare. “Look, this was a stupid idea, okay?”

“I don’t know about that, Deputy. I got a laugh out of it.” She rolled her eyes. “And fighting nature’s never turned out well for anyone. You need to learn to adapt if you plan on surviving.”

“I’ve done okay so far.”

“You could do better.”

Rook scoffed. “What, are you pitching some sort of patented Jacob Seed field guide? Oh, please tell me more, Mr. all-knowing mountain man.”

He cracked half a smile at that, something far more real than she’d ever seen from him. While she stood, struck by the expression, he walked forward and passed her, looking back briefly in invitation. After a moment of indecision, she turned to walk beside him. She could always jump off the cliff if things got too intolerable, after all. “Would you even be patient enough to listen, Deputy?”

Somehow they kept talking. Well— bickering. She couldn’t force herself away from the tension and he wouldn’t give up on the fucking philosophy. They’d been walking, more than arm’s distance apart, and muddling through conversation for almost an hour when a rustling close to the bluff’s edge caught her attention. Eager for any distraction from the riot of emotions all the arguing spurred in her, Rook abruptly cut off and moved to investigate.

A hissing wolverine _flew_ from the bushes.

Jacob suddenly grabbed her by the waist and yanked her away, lifting her off her feet, but she’d already pulled her glock from her shoulder holster, and all this time shooting peggies left her with fantastic aim, so two echoing bangs later the wolverine lay a twitching mass in the dirt.

With her heart still beating fast, he settled her gently onto her feet. She whirled to him with a huff. He looked between the dead wolverine and her, expression almost impressed. For a fleeting moment, there was some semblance of warmth in his eyes. He looked more… real. Alive. Rook took a cautious step back, needing distance back between them, then looked at the wolverine as well before back at him.

“Huh. Thanks.”

They met in secret again.

(“So you threw yourself down the stairs while tied to a fuckin’ rolling chair.”

“No offense, but I wasn’t going to stay there and wait for John to come back and start cutting up on me. Thanks to you, I know exactly what shade of red blood is, and I didn’t wanna end up covered in it.”

“You didn’t bother trying to untie yourself first.”

“Oh, wow, I hadn’t thought of that! Thanks so much, Jake! No, fuck you, of course I tried. Unfortunately, your brother’s real good with rope.”

“Something’s not quite right hearing that from you, Deputy.”

“Hey, I didn’t ask to gain this horrible knowledge.”)

Then again.

(“I don’t think-- if you were dehydrated and delirious and sun stroked, that’s not a choice, Jacob, that’s desperation.”

“Rook…”

“We do what we do to survive. It’s all we are.”

“Doesn’t make the nightmares go away.”

“I know.”

“If I didn’t I wouldn’t have seen my brothers again. I proved myself strong enough to make it this far. It was my test.”

“You don’t believe that.”

“I do.”

“Then what has mine been? What will mine be? Not the trials. You can’t manufacture fate like that. And if you make me run another, I’m never speaking to you again. I’ll put the bullet between your eyes myself.”

“I’m not about to underestimate you, honey, trust me.”

“I don’t.”)

And again.

(“Your eyes are blue. Your eyes are very, very blue. They’re the only things I’ve seen that shade, since…”

“Since you broke my nose?”

“Well. Since we found this out, but that too. You deserved it.”)

And once more.

(“If it hasn’t happened yet, it’s gonna. The weight of it will fall down around you and you’ll be crushed for trying to play hero. Heroes aren’t real, Deputy, and you’re gonna get yourself hurt.”

“Jacob…”

“You’re gonna feel every kill and all you're gonna see is the blood on your hands.”

“I know. I do, I know.”)

Okay— a lot more.

(“Can’t believe you say that fucking thing’s your friend.”

“Peaches is adorable and a gift from on high. Go say hi to Jacob, Peaches.”

“Christ.”)

(“So I hold it… like this?”

“No. Like this.”

“Well, this thing is fucking heavy, Jacob, I can’t really hold it that high up! No wonder your shoulders are so damn broad.”

“You been paying them a lot of attention, have you, honey?”

“No.”)

(“That was impressive. You aren’t a bad shot. With handguns.”

“Well, they taught us in cop school, you know.”

“Don’t get snarky, Deputy.”

“You know I’ll do what I want. Now shush and enjoy the picnic.”)

They never got any closer than that second touch. It seemed a line she didn’t want to tread, and one he resisted from pushing. She wondered sometimes, what it would be like to give in to that inexorable pull to him and let herself _feel,_ but then she would chide herself for not focusing on the more important things. Whatever they were, it wasn’t allies, and the conflict in the county was crucial.

Eventually, something bothered her enough to try asking Nick about, in the most roundabout and sly way possible, of course. “So— I have a friend.” Great start, Rook. Great. “And they said, when they’re not around their soulmate they get this weird… ache, in their chest. Just, heavy, and lonesome. Is that a soulmate thing people don’t talk about? All you ever really hear about are the colors.”

“I dunno, Dep, that sounds a lot like regular missing someone. When Kim’n’I first met I never got anything like that, only after we got to know each other and I was missin’ her, so I don’t think it’s just a soulmate thing. How long’s this, uh, friend of yours known their soulmate?”

Oh. Well. Fuck.

She pretended to see some Peggies and ducked in the grass to tactfully change the subject.

The dilemma was this: Rook wouldn’t give up the resistance. Rook was willing to kill every single one of the Seeds, with a single exception, to save her people. Jacob wouldn’t let her kill them, wouldn’t let them kill her. And Joseph wouldn’t give up on the cult, or the idea that the end of the fucking world was upon them.

When it came down to it, when Rook had cleared almost every cult outpost, been kidnapped by the other two siblings twice each, and destroyed every wolf beacon, silo, and shrine; right when the whole county teetered on the edge, news of what happened to Moscow reached their radios. In the aftermath, her pride fractured. She didn’t believe Joseph. But she did now believe the whole world teetered on the edge. In a quiet clearing they’d claimed as their own in a soft, unspoken way, Rook broke and asked Jacob to arrange negotiations. She didn’t expect it to be easy, but—

“Those are outdated military installations. You don’t have the numbers to run them long term. You know you don’t. That’s why you’ve been taking people, building your followers over the years.” Rook stood in the center of the church, the very same place she’d been when attempting to arrest Joseph. Sharky and Grace flanked her from several steps back, and Peaches lurked at her feet, with the rest of her crew and the major resistance leaders just outside. The Seed family stood opposite her, no devotees inside this time. Joseph stood front and center.

“The chosen will survive to create a New Eden.”

Rook clenched her jaw with frustration, keeping just enough control to stop her eyes darting to Jacob where he stood near the altar. She didn’t know what he’d said to get the meeting, how he’d justified it, but she trusted him to have kept their secret.

“If you want them to survive in those bunkers, you’ll need to cooperate. We’ll all need to cooperate.”

“Why the change of heart, Deputy? Why the hesitation? You’ve never once chosen to cooperate before. You’ve been so eager to run rampant and destroy what we’ve built. Yet you stop shy of killing any of us? Of dealing the final death blow to the Project?”

Rook froze, unable to work through a plausible response for her hesitation without _screaming_ about how the world really was fucking ending, how millions had died in Moscow, how she hadn’t asked for any of this. Her heart fluttered with nerves, from the gravity of it all and the difficulty of worming her way out of a situation with her words rather than a gun. In her mind’s eye, she could see everything falling to pieces, the whole county and all her friends perishing in the looming possibility of nuclear war. Now, now was the time for a truly last ditch effort.

Finally giving into the overwhelming urge, she let herself look at Jacob. Their eyes met; she let the cool, piercing blue ease her anxiety, and for a soothing moment it was only them. Only him there across from her, settling her nerves with that familiar, strong presence of his. She took a slow breath. Then Joseph spoke.

“A traitor in our midst, then?”

“No. You know I wouldn’t betray you. Wouldn’t do that to my family.”

The brothers stared at each other. Rook could practically sense John biting his tongue with the effort of not jumping in. Jacob stepped down from the altar, walked over to join her, steady as he always was. He stopped by her side.

“She’s my soulmate.” A shudder ran down her spine at the possessive edge to his tone; he’d never _claimed_ her like that, not even in that first violent meeting, not even aa a threat. Not even as they slowly grew closer. She wanted to grab him, have the conversations they always danced around— what was she to him now, what did he really feel about them being soulmates, what did he _want_. Rook wanted many things, very suddenly, least of all to grab his hand. But she didn’t, instead taking comfort simply from his presence beside her. “Been able to see in color since I had her in the Grand View.”

“Oh, holy shit, shorty! Plot twist!” Sharky exclaimed behind her. Grace said nothing, but Rook noted her shifting to a more combat ready stance from the corner of her eye.

“We are. But we, we’re— friends.” Count that as the weirdest moment of defining the relationship she’d ever had. “And he’s the most tactically minded of all of you and he agrees that this is how we get the best shot at survival, and you have to listen to me, to us.”

Joseph approaching stopped her runaway tongue.

“This is a sign. A portent from the heavens.” His widened eyes seemed to bore into her very soul, bright blue tinted strangely by his hideous yellow glasses. “We will work with you. _Our_ family will lead the people to New Eden together.”

Her heart sank, and she wanted to emphasize the friends part again, but she found she didn’t have it in her. If she’d known it would be that fucking easy—

“So’s that mean you’re gettin’ married now, Dep?” Sharky piped up, and she tipped her head enough to see him while keeping Joseph in her peripheral. “Cuz, I- I know it’s not traditional exactly, but I’d really like to be one’ve your bridesmaids. I don’t care if ya want me to wear a dress, I just think as ride or die buds it’s only fittin’ I be in your party supporting you. Or no dress! Don’t think you’ll get Jess or Grace in dresses, which, you know me, I think that’s totally fine! Don’t wanna get too tied up in traditional gender roles ‘n all.”

Rook laughed, a little stressed and a little hysterical, but a laugh all the same, then looked sidealong at Jacob. He looked half-amused, but steady and serious beneath it, expression tight in the way that said he was thinking hard. Because there would be a lot to figure out now, she knew. One hurdle crossed, and a dozen further complications to solve yet.

The news about them spread fast, as fast as the news of the cease fire, because none of the Seeds except Jacob could keep their damn mouths shut, and Sharky most certainly couldn’t either. Luckily they were too busy now for people to bug her much about it, and when they did, Rook could always fake needed to rush to one of the bunkers or the compound to make arrangements.

The negotiations stretched on another two weeks. They squabbled over who would go where, how supplies would be apportioned, what sort of communications would be kept up over the years. It stretched on, but they made progress; Rook made absolutely sure they never stalled out, even if meant getting aggressive or calling on Jacob to back her up. Mostly he sat, watched her argue, and offered logistical suggestions. During what was meant to be the final meeting, the bombs dropped.

It was— terrifying. Despite knowing what to expect if it did happen, and having some semblance of an idea that it would, the sight was still awe-inspiring. An unnatural brightness, followed by the almost deafening noise of it, then the wind and chaotic debris it kicked up. There was a mad dash to the car, a hectic drive off the island, and more driving and running and screaming that melded into a hazy blur of terror. All she could do was stick to the plan, do her part, and hope it all worked out.

It was almost too much to believe. Rook couldn’t get her heart to stop its frantic beat, even as she watched the bunker doors close with a heavy finality. Jacob brushed passed her as she stared, touching her back briefly and imparting some small shard of peace in the madness.

It wasn’t until they’d run through the list of civilians meant to be in this bunker and found everyone accounted for that the tension bled from Rook. There was more to do, the other bunkers to check in with, organizational teams to be created and the running of the whole damn thing to be sorted, then another seven years underground to survive, but— they did it. They did it. She released a shaky breath, and ran a hand over her messy hair, eyes automatically seeking out Jacob.

A quiet look of satisfaction and pride touched his features, only visible to her because, she realized with a jolt, she knew him so well at this point. His mouth was relaxed, no tick in his jaw, and the serious lines of his face had relaxed some, giving way only to the crinkle of crow’s feet at the corners of his eyes that signaled an almost but not quite smile. To her, he may as well been waving a sign that declared him ecstatic while singing aloud with joy. She felt about the same.

But he wasn’t looking at the people they saved, what they accomplished together. He was looking at her. Their eyes met, and a wave of wonder and disbelief rushed through her, disarming and sudden. The same overwhelming sensation as when she’d first seen color from his touch, but stripped of the fear and built up with a true companionship. A laugh bubbled up to her lips, feeling more lightness and relief than she had since even before Burke showed up with his warrant, and, without thought, she darted forward the few steps between her and Jacob, rocked up on the tips of her toes, and dragged him down by the lapels of his jacket to kiss him with everything she had.

He stiffened, for just a moment, then swooped forward to catch her by the waist, never letting his lips leave hers. When he straightened, her feet lifted off the ground, held completely as she was in his grasp. His beard scratched against her skin as they kissed, impassioned and hard and not particularly gracefully. All she needed was to press herself into every pore of him, and she wrapped her arms around his neck to get even closer.

Distantly, she heard muffled catcalls, and Nick shouting something that sounded like, “Aw, c’mon, Dep, what the hell? Not in front of the baby!”

She laughed against Jacob’s mouth, a smile curving her lips even as she refused to part from him. His hands slipped lower from her waist, gaining an even louder shout of protest from Nick, and he hooked his fingers under her thighs to hoist her up and begin walking away. She full on cackled with glee, and the shouts of her friends died down with the distance as Jacob carried her away.

They reached a room long ago decided to be his, one she’d only ever actually glimpsed from the outside while they organized everything. Even now, she didn’t get a good look, consumed with him as she was. He nudged the door shut behind them, and settled her gently on the standard issue uncomfortable bed, but she didn’t let her legs untangle from his waist just yet. Instead she tried to tug him closer above her, using the combined pull of them and her arms around his shoulders to upset his balance until his entire weight fell atop her. She laughed, squished though she was, as she felt him shake his head in annoyance before he pulled back to give her a stern look.

“This isn’t going to be easy.”

“I know, I know.”

“This isn’t the end of it.”

“I know, I know.”

“Seven years is a long time. We can’t let ourselves get complacent or weak. We’ll be completely overrun once we return to the surface if we don’t keep training.”

“Jacob.” Rook said sternly, leaning up to take his face in her hands and look at him straight on. “We survived. We’ve ensured our best shot at survival. We made it through the bombs. We’ll make it through anything else the world throws at us. But right now— right now, Jacob, be here with me.”

His eyes searched her face intently, guarded wonder in those pale blue eyes. “You want this.”

“Yes.” She did, she did. Her heart sang with it. “Do you?”

He was so intensely focused on her, face so serious, she felt no shred of doubt at his answer. “Yes.”

“Then come here and kiss me, soulmate.”

With something almost like a real smile touching his lips and eyes, he closed in on her to obey.

They went slower this time, less panicked than the clash of lips in the moment she’d jumped him, but no less intense for it. He kissed like he wanted to know every inch of her, licking slow and dirty into her mouth and pulling whimpers from her lips. For a suspended moment they simply kissed, him holding himself above her so as to not crush the breath from her lungs, and finally her hands came back to his lapels before pushing just inside, fingertips smoothing over his neck then into the back collar of his shirt.

He stiffened, enough for her to feel the tense of his muscles under his roughened skin, and her heart swelled with unbidden affection and sadness, and she pulled him even closer, breaking the kiss to press her cheek against his, breathing heavily as his beard scratched against her skin. “After all this, you have to know scars aren’t gonna frighten me off.”

Jacob withdrew to examine her intently, his pupils widened to crowd out the pale blue of his eyes. Rook wanted him, needed him. After all this time, all their hushed conversations and quiet moments, it rattled her mind to actually be experiencing this. It felt whole and it felt right and still she needed more. She wet her bottom lip, then continued. “Please, I need you. I wanna feel you…”

With a broken groan, he surged forward to capture her lips again, messy and devouring, and grabbed her wrist to pin it above her head. She tugged just to feel his grip, then whined as he moved lower to mouth at her neck. “You’re mine.” He groaned against her skin, and she shuddered with a sharp gasp, feeling his words with a heavy throb in her center. “Didn’t think I had a soulmate. Didn’t ever expect ‘em to immediately headbutt me if I did.”

She interrupted him with a laugh, and he smirked up at her, tugging her shirt down her chest. A shiver ran over her skin at the feeling of his lips on her collar. “Again, you deserved it. Luckily you grew on me.”

“Luckily.” Apparently changing his mind, he let go of her wrist to bunch her shirt up, and she immediately wiggled to tug it over her head and toss to the side. He watched appreciatively, eyes dark. “And you’ve changed your mind about fighting nature.”

She paused, looking at him looking up at her from above her stomach, her skin shivery and tight with wanting. “I changed my mind about you. You changed. We changed.”

“I’m still a broken old soldier. Nothing’s ever gonna change that, honey.”

“You’re _mine_.” Rook said emphatically, digging her fingers into his forearms. His fingers tightened where they gripped her hips and in a blink he had surged back up to her, and stolen another long, torturous kiss. “You’re mine and you’re driving me crazy.” She gasped when he released her lips, driven to utter distraction by the ache between her thighs increasingly spurred on by his attentions. She felt his smile against her lips.

“You want something, you can ask, soulmate.” The low rasp of his voice in his taunt drove her wild.

Rook groaned, gripping him even tighter and speaking soft in a whisper against his skin. “Fuck me, please, Jacob.”

His rough hand trailed down her bare torso, drawing goosebumps in its wake, down to the fly of her jeans. Her breath caught in anticipation and he laughed low and breathy in a way that shot another spike of arousal straight to her core. “Eager. Lemme see just how wet you are for me, honey.”

She whined, but he followed up on his word and pushed passed her waistband to slip slow into her underwear and part her lips. His finger only traced around her entrance, gathering wetness to drag back up to her clit, and it was so slow and so perfect and not nearly enough.

He toyed with her, seeming to gain satisfaction from the breathy noises he wrung out of her by pressing and squeezing at her clit then dipping so smoothly just inside her before drawing out. She lost herself in it, until everything was the aching need and she was trembling and drenched for him.

“Please, don’t drag it out.” Rook had trouble sorting through the words. His slow teasing had already thoroughly wrecked her, but she needed him, now. “We have— forever for you to tease. But I’ve waited so damn long for this…”

His eyes hooked on hers, and she knew they were on the same page. “Well, I won’t say no when you’re begging so pretty for me.”

With a sharp tug from him and a push from her, the jeans and underwear joined the rest of her clothes on the ground. Her chest rose and fell quickly, and she looked him over, shaking her head. “You’re overdressed.”

After an amused scoff, he undressed quickly, perfunctorily, and someday she’d trace her hands slow over every inch of him and kiss his scars and they’d take their time with things, but now, in the heat of their first moments truly together, all she needed was him inside of her. When he finished, she tangled her legs back around his hips to draw him close, her hands going to his chest to finally feel the strong muscles below his skin. He braced one hand beneath her, the other going to press his fingers easily into her again before taking himself in hand.

Jacob pushed into her slowly, aching and torturous, until his hips met hers and she felt utterly and perfectly full. No words escaped her lips, she couldn’t possibly form them, only a helpless moan at the feeling of her soulmate filling her up. The ache of it ceded under the emotion welling in her heart, but there was a breathless pause while they both stilled for her to adjust. Then she pulled him close and he kissed her, capturing the needy sounds she made, and withdrew his hips before pushing hard back in. Rook keened, feeling like all the breath had been pulled from her. He started up a slow pace, sending more heat flushing through her with every tight drag of him in and out. The moments stretched out, everything narrowed down to them and the feeling until she was practically writhing with it, moaning unabashedly with pleasure.

“Look at you, so desperate for my cock, taking it so perfectly. We were made for this, honey. Made for each other.” He sounded as out of breath as she felt, looked as wrecked too, with his pupils blown wide but eyes fixed on her.

“You’re mine, mine.” She gasped, squirming underneath him and pulling his body closer to hers. A fine layer of sweat mixed between them, and everything inside her felt heated and taut. “Faster, faster. I’m not gonna— god, I’m not gonna last long, Jacob.”

With a groan, his hand pressed hard into the back of her thigh, forcing her knee to the side of her chest and changing the angle in a way that made her squirm, all at once needing to escape the overstimulation and needing more of the perfect spot he hit in her. Already she was trembling, losing herself in the noises they made and the sound of skin on skin and the blissful way he felt inside her. He fucked her hard, and fast, and she arched up into every thrust.

“I wanna see the face you make when you come for me.” His hand slipped down to her clit, to play in maddening circles as he fucked into her, and Rook whimpered. The tension built sharply, and her thighs clenched tighter around his hips. “Wanna see my soulmate know how good I can make her feel, how fucking right this is. C’mon, sweetheart.”

His voice pushed her over the edge, that raspy growl sending shivers through her until the tension snapped and she gasped sharply, pleasure wracking through her as she spasmed around his cock, mind going blank with the flood of pure satisfaction he triggered in her.

Jacob fucked her through it, overstimulating and lovely to drag out the arcs and coursing bliss, though the feeling of her clenching and tightening around him, and the sight of her, if his eyes still fixed on her face were any indication, had clearly pushed him close to the edge. With a stuttering jerk of his hips and choked off cry, he buried himself deep within her and came, holding her so tight as he released into her that it almost hurt. She clutched back as tightly, letting out a broken moan at the feeling of him filling her as he shuddered through it. Rook tried to catch her breath and ran a hand through his hair, little jolts of arousal still dancing over her skin.

There were other discussions to be had about what all this meant, about what they meant, but the thoughts only floated through her hazy post-orgasm mind for her acknowledge and accept. There would always be more for them to deal with, but she knew he would be beside her through it all.

Jacob collapsed with a huff, on his side to face her. Things in the room went quiet besides their breathing, a bubble of peace in the chaos containing only them. She looked at him, feeling nothing but wonder and awe as their eyes met. He smiled, that small and easily missed genuine one, just a tug at the corners of his mouth, and her heart felt full to bursting.

Rook lay there with her soulmate, catching her breath and taking in every lovely color he had revealed to her. 

**Author's Note:**

> whoooo! This got wildly out of hand, and I was a liiiittle out of my depth working with tones and concept I don’t tend to write but I honestly had so much fun working on this and being part of this exchange!! I hope it turned out alright, and also happy first birthday to fc5(:


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